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TOPIC TITLE: Tisha B'Av
Created On 7/5/13 7:23 AM
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mouse
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7/5/13 7:23 AM
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Anyone else nervous about this??? For me at this point it isn't the fasting since I barely can (I don't' usually even get to chatzos, and NO I don't feel guilty about it.) I just find Kinos so depressing. I guess they are meant to be but when I hear the suffering people have endured through the ages it's just too much for me to deal with. I feel guilty for being depressed when I am not even trying to stay alive and these people died L'shem Shamayim. I feel guilty because I always wonder if I'd die to be Jewish or if I'd cave in and convert. I don't know because I've never been in that position but it scares me taht I wouldn't live up to that standard. Does any of this make sense??? If it does please reply.


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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channafofanna
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7/5/13 9:02 AM
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The way I see it is that they had it easy. They had to die all shem Hashem. Or just die because they were a jew We have to live it. They made one decision and get olam habah. We have to make desicions every single day!! So we have it harder.
The way I also see it is that they got olam habah for comiting suicide. They are considered heros. But you know who are the greater heros? us who decide NOT TO DIE!!!
What you are saying makes sence, but in my opinion you are so much greater and you have beat more odds then they have. I dont know if this is total apikosis what im saying, but in my opinion you are greater. Also they had the peer pressure to live up to that standard. Wheres our peer pressure to stay alive?
Face it Munkster, your holy!
 
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HopefulMommy
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7/5/13 9:48 AM
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I agree 100%, Channa!

Munkster, I can relate. I was told that if kinnos make you depressed you shouldn't focus on them. Just skim them, or skip altogether.
 
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mouse
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7/5/13 9:53 AM
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Thank you, Channa and HM....I'll try to remember.


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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keep climbing
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7/5/13 10:13 AM
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Wow, thanx for this thread.
I already decided not to say kinos a couple of years ago because they made me so sad.....I'm ready to give up fasting as well...
My job is to stay healthy (as much as I can) I am an Ones (forced) and don't feel guilty. But I had to get to that point.
 
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channafofanna
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7/6/13 10:55 PM
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Good for you Keep Climbing!!!
 
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wishtobehappy
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7/7/13 11:13 AM
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you made me feel much better keep climbing. thanks.
 
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Lasthope
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7/13/13 4:36 PM
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I always get confused on tisha bav. Th whole year im trying to nt be sa and the. This day comes when ur suppose to be sad. But its different cuz despair and sadness are verydifferent. But i have a hard time seperating the two. So i never know what to think on this day. I think if. I were to ask a rabbi he would say just try to be as happy as u can and the fasting is enough of a symbol expressing the great destruction. But we are here to rebuild and only smiles and love will do that.
 
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channafofanna
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7/13/13 9:56 PM
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yeah, but u cant rebuild until you realise what you lost... and that is sad......
 
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MoMo
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7/14/13 2:33 AM
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I see Tisha Bav as a day of mourning for all our troubles.
So I cry over all the hardship all of us go through and for the lack of connection.

It's the perfect day to cry about everything that's wrong in my life...
 
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emunahdoj
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7/14/13 5:05 AM
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I agree with you Momo. If Moshiach comes, there will be no more mental illness, suffering, etc. So Tisha b' av is really an opportunity to see how messed up our world is and how we really really need Moshiach.
 
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MoMo
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7/14/13 10:17 AM
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In a way this time of year is perfect for me to allow my inner pain to be expressed. I have a lot of pain that needs to be expressed -I am glad I have the opportunity to express it.

Put it this way: Tisha b'av matches what I feel a lot more than Purim does...
 
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MoMo
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7/14/13 10:19 AM
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All pain is a result of Galus and the lack of connection to our real source...
 
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HopefulMommy
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7/14/13 10:29 AM
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I never thought of it this way, but you're right, Momo. Reminds me of my grandmother, a"h, who used to say that she had no trouble fasting when she thought about all the family members who were killed by the Nazis, y"s.
 
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mouse
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7/17/13 6:02 AM
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Don't know what to say.....Tisha B'Av came and went and I was unable to fast due to health issues. I was sad. Not very and perhaps not for the right reasons. I thought about Mashiach....and there is an OOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLDDDDDDDDDD song that came to mind about it.....maybe Avraham Freid....dunno or MBD........"there will be a time and it won't be so long we'll have back our prayer and we'll have back our song....." I find the song sad cuz you realize what you DON"T have. So mainly that drummed through my head. I felt inferior because I couldn't fast. Saying Kinos at this point is/was probably not what was best either so I didn't say them. Too scary and ddepressign for me. Too real. Reminds me of going to the Burnt Housse in the Rova (Old City Jewish Quarter.) The movie was too scary to see and deal with.


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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keep climbing
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7/17/13 9:16 AM
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I couldn't fast more than till Chatzos either. And availus is a black hole for me. If I open it, I run a huge risk of slipping into serious depression......So I did what I could. It's not a good feeling at all, but I know that this is what Hashem wants from me right now. Hopefully, it will get better......
 
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HopefulMommy
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7/17/13 10:21 AM
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I remember that song! I did fast, B"H, but skipped the kinnos. So glad it's over!
 
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channafofanna
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7/17/13 1:47 PM
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Whats the song called? on what album?
 
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mouse
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7/17/13 7:29 PM
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It was from so long ago, I don't know what album or the name of the song....it starts off with Eichah being read then goes into "Oh there wil be a time and it won't be soo long we'll have back our prayer, we'll have back our song a voice filled with............yes that day will come it willl come...... and goes onn.....with words i can't remember....Nice song.... comforting in a weird way. Probably came out in the 80's......well after "Mr. Carter" song by Miami Boys Choir.


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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HopefulMommy
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7/17/13 9:26 PM
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It's not even a CD. It's a tape. Can't remember who performed it, but I probably have the tape somewhere.
 
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mouse
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7/18/13 6:11 AM
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Yeah, I guess it's from the time of the dino's. Glad I'm not the only one who can remember it. It was a good song. Always made me want Mashiach so much more and conjured up pics of the Beis Hamikdash. I know it sounds odd, but I'm not a music person....this one stuck in my head though.


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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HopefulMommy
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7/18/13 1:05 PM
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On a different note, I feel so much better emotionally now that Tisha B'Av is over. It's a different energy in the air.
 
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wishtobehappy
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7/18/13 1:36 PM
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yup. same here. something about the nine days brings out the worst in me every single year.
 
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