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TOPIC TITLE: When to go on drugs
Created On 7/30/13 3:12 PM
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Mimi1022
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7/30/13 3:12 PM
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My doctor was thinking of prescribing me antidepressants. How depressed does someone need to be in order to take drugs? I would say I am somewhat hopeless at times and lonely, although I'm not crying every minute. I'm so busy that I don't have time to be very depressed
 
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keep climbing
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7/30/13 4:37 PM
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How long are you feeling like this?
Did you try therapy?
 
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Lasthope
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7/30/13 6:38 PM
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Try intense therapy/psychotherapy before u go on meds. You may need them and i dont know you, but the side effects can be debilitating and u get a better investment by pouring money into your therapy thandrugs
 
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channafofanna
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8/21/13 5:16 PM
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IMHO- whys suffer for longer? at least try meds. worst case scenario you can stop them.... at least get the process rolling...
 
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Mimi1022
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8/21/13 5:22 PM
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Thanks! I actually feel much better emotionally now that I am on sleeping pills. I think I got depressed from only sleeping 2-3 hrs per night and working 60 hrs per week!! Pressure!!!
 
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channafofanna
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8/21/13 9:37 PM
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yeah... that can do it....
 
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I'mTrying
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8/21/13 11:06 PM
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Please excuse my asking, it's not meant to be rude, but Mimi1022, if your depression is only due to lack of sleep and you're otherwise emotionally healthy and 'ok'- then why are you on this site? You have hurt members here and I have not seen any sort of apology or acknowledgement from you. You just keep posting as if nothing ever happened.
Please don't ignore this post like you have ignored MoMo's posts to you. More than one of us want (wants?) an answer.
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/21/13 11:48 PM
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I second that. Mimi, I truly don't understand you. We're here to support each other. If you're not interested in being supportive why are you here?
 
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gad
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8/22/13 6:16 AM
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I understand that people were hurt by some comments

I empathize. It's no fun and can be emotionally devastating to be the brunt of it.

However, sometimes people may mean well, and just lack sensitivity or know how.

I myself was guilty of this in the early days on frum support.
I remember that I got blasted. Eventually I realized, that although I meant well, I was not understanding enough.
At one point I asked for forgiveness, and quickly received it.

Misguided? Yes. Not smart? Yes. Vindictive? No

The offending poster here has been told off. Which is important.

But It's not necessary to push her away.
If you don't like her posts, you can ignore it.
Or you can tell yourself, that maybe she needs more support than you.

In the spirit of Elul, maybe we can ignore other people's shortcomings, (sometimes we may need to point out their shortcomings), and to generally feel compassion.

Kesvia vichasima toivo for a good and sweet year


Edited: 8/22/13 at 6:32 AM by gad
 
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MoMo
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8/22/13 7:20 AM
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It is wrong to turn a blind eye when someone is blatantly hurting others.

People have to know that it is not OK to say hurtful things to others!!
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/22/13 10:18 AM
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Gad, welcome back! So nice to see you here again! Kesiva vechasima tova to you too!

From what I've learned, a person needs to apologize to those she hurt in order to be forgiven.
 
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gad
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8/23/13 11:50 AM
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Quote

Originally posted by: MoMo
It is wrong to turn a blind eye when someone is blatantly hurting others.

People have to know that it is not OK to say hurtful things to others!!


You already told her
 
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gad
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8/23/13 11:54 AM
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Quote

Originally posted by: HopefulMommy
Gad, welcome back! So nice to see you here again! Kesiva vechasima tova to you too!

From what I've learned, a person needs to apologize to those she hurt in order to be forgiven.


We're not allowed to bear a grudge
 
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toy123
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8/23/13 4:07 PM
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I'm sorry gad but you're 100% wrong. You weren't the one hurt so it's easy for you to talk. I just wonder what you would do if this happened to you?


-------------------------
Sometimes you need to run away just to see who will follow you.

Sometimes when I say "I'm okay", I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight and say "I know you are not".

Just because I'm smiling doesn't mean I'm happy.
 
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Lasthope
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8/24/13 2:25 PM
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Gad, she was extremely mean to a suicidal person. Saying its "no fun" is a bit of an understatement. If i were in Toys positioni would be waiting for an apology too. And we are just backing her up, not turning anyone away. Just waiting for a response.
 
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MoMo
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8/24/13 9:54 PM
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Yup, we all stand behind Toy123.
We won't allow people to blatantly hurt one of our own without apologizing.
 
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channafofanna
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8/24/13 11:43 PM
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isn't telling someone they are rude also hurting them?
just a thought...
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/25/13 12:39 AM
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No, actually. It's doing them a favor because it's making them aware that they need to make amends. That's why it says that we should rebuke others right after "don't hate your brother in your heart." If you feel negativity towards someone you should bring it up with them in order to give them an opportunity to explain themselves. That's exactly what we've been doing here. We've been asking Mimi for an explanation. She's been ignoring us completely. Something is off here. And I don't feel safe on FrumSupport while this is going on.
 
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gad
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8/25/13 1:08 AM
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It says, that if you know that your friend won't listen to your rebuke, then it is forbidden to rebuke him.

Instead of miring oneself in a muddy pit, it's often better to just ignore things.
 
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toy123
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8/25/13 1:11 AM
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gad I'm curious why are you so defending mimi and not me? I was the one hurt. I was the one who went away from the computer crying hurt....


-------------------------
Sometimes you need to run away just to see who will follow you.

Sometimes when I say "I'm okay", I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight and say "I know you are not".

Just because I'm smiling doesn't mean I'm happy.
 
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gad
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8/25/13 1:33 AM
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I understand your pain. I said that at the beginning.

The question is, what to do about it.

People have already told her off.

The question is, what to do now.

Sometimes it's better to ignore something, rather than hit back and possibly make things worse.
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/25/13 2:31 AM
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We are still waiting for a response. We haven't gotten any. I'm still trying to understand where Mimi is coming from, and why something just doesn't add up here. And unless I'm missing something here, if someone insists on being judgmental then they don't belong in a support forum where everyone else is doing their best to be supportive. That's not bearing a grudge. That's being practical.
 
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gad
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8/25/13 8:33 AM
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It says that in the days of geulah, there will be a thirst to hear G-d's words.

Numerous questions have been raised here.
What would a rav say?


Edited: 8/25/13 at 9:03 AM by gad
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/25/13 9:34 AM
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I wish we had a Rav here on FrumSupport.
 
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keep climbing
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8/25/13 11:32 AM
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I'm horrified at the turn of events on this site.
Of course, Mimi, you should apologize to Toy.
But for the rest of my Fellow Sufferers on Frum Support--
I'm writing this with a prayer on my lips that you accept this the way I mean it--for everybody's benefit.
I didn't want to join in this discussion because I am A victim of a terrible family machlokes, and I really hate to get involved.
But I can't stand by idly and let this site fall apart.
My family machlokes lasted for years and left terrible destruction and damage behind it.
There are no words to describe the torture we all went through.
We were right, but we ended up right and dead.
With hindsight, I can say that we should have definitely given in even though we were 100% right.
Our loss was not worth our gain.
So if my FS, you are willing to listen to someone who has been there, let's just continue to suppport each other as we have until now.
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/25/13 11:33 AM
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You guys, we can make this work! Let's work on it together. It's up to us to keep this forum safe and supportive, and I truly believe that we can do it!
 
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gad
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8/25/13 12:26 PM
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I think that everyone meant well.
In general, the tone of the discussions were respectful.

Still, it's good to examine the past, to learn for the future.
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/25/13 12:32 PM
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I think it's a matter of setting boundaries. There are certain things that cross the boundaries of acceptable on a mental health support forum. Calling people crazy is certainly unacceptable! That should not be tolerated. We're not kicking anyone out. We're asking people to stay within the boundaries of acceptable, and to make amends when these boundaries are breached.
 
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gad
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8/25/13 12:53 PM
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I think that it's important to have a moderator who can referee.

I don't think that posters should be policemen
 
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gad
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8/25/13 1:41 PM
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I sent a message to the administrator, asking what the procedure is in case a moderator is needed.

Maybe the members who left will be willing to return, if a safe and comfortable environment can be had.
 
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HopefulMommy
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8/25/13 2:19 PM
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Thanks Gad! Hope this can be resolved without losing any members here.
 
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MoMo
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8/25/13 2:57 PM
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