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TOPIC TITLE: People who are patronizing
Created On 7/17/14 9:00 AM
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Teddybear
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7/17/14 9:00 AM
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I've come across this in more than one setting.

Anyone ever deal with someone who is always complimenting you to the point where it seems patronizing? How do you handle it? Every time I do something it seems to warrant a compliment and it gets excessive and awkward .
 
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channafofanna
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7/17/14 11:33 AM
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I think I know what youre talking about.
Do they do it to everyone or just you? Are they a friend? Boss? Coleague? etc
Do they work with kids or specail needs cuz then theyre probably just used to being overly complementary and end up doing that to others. There are times when Ive caugth myself saying "WOW!! AMAZING JOB!!" to my friends and it was just stupid....
Are you sure its to much? Maybe you really deserve it and you wont let yourself accept that so you think of it as excessive?
Are they trying to help youre depression or win your friendship?

 
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Teddybear
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7/17/14 1:35 PM
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Good questions. Yes, it's too much.
 
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channafofanna
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7/18/14 3:46 PM
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I guess the questions are too good to be answered =D
But I sympathize....
 
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Teddybear
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7/18/14 7:09 PM
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I hate to say this but it's actually a mental health clinic. Now, mental illness is not the same as developmental disabilities - ie special needs - but for some reason this individual thinks it does, and whenever I am in her presence and, for example, a nurse asks me a question, she will not only speak for me but talk about me in the room like I am not even there. She's been working there for more than a year and is not new, but I just don't enjoy being treated like I'm 3 years old or incapacitated. I could bring it up to her supervisor but if she is well liked there it could backfire and make me look like a difficult patient since I just started there and especially if I'm the first one to bring it up. (Although I doubt she acts any differently with the other patients.)
 
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channafofanna
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7/20/14 5:25 PM
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Could you tell her? Write a letter?
I find that alot with mental health. Were treated like were babies cuz were mentaly ill, but in reality our illnesses age us more than everyone else...
 
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Teddybear
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7/20/14 9:35 PM
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Perhaps I'm not understanding you correctly. What sort of letter do you think would be effective without being weird? As you might imagine handing a letter to someone in an administrative/secretary type of position is a bit awkward no?
 
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channafofanna
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7/20/14 10:34 PM
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Oh, youre right, now that I think of it, a letter probably would be weird... Sorry.
But hey, she might compliment you on your spelling! lol!
 
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Teddybear
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7/21/14 1:56 AM
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That's interesting, what about my spelling do you think is worth complimenting?
 
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mouse
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7/21/14 10:13 AM
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I think you should approach the person who is excessively praising or whatever and tell them you're having depression doesn't translate to spazhood, defects or anythng else so they can stop exaggerating praise or whatever. Be sharp. If you're not their favorite person, does it matter that much??? At least you have your dignity and MAYBE the person will cut it out. Being talked down to is not a good thing and people who do it should be put in their place.


-------------------------

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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channafofanna
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7/21/14 5:14 PM
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Sorry I wasnt clear! I was making a joke
 
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