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TOPIC TITLE: i'm a pig
Created On 10/27/08 1:42 AM
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mouse
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Posts: 1932
Joined: Oct 2007

10/27/08 1:42 AM
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i'm so upset....i ate chocolate today....lots....gained about 6 lbs total in 2 days....i feel so piggy....i didn't even try to throw up. i just binged. too lazy to get rid of it. after gastric bypass gaining weight is so bad and scary. usually i throw up, but this time i didn't. i'm so mad i did it at all. just need to vent


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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Debbi
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10/27/08 1:59 AM
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i see u r up too, in the dead of the night.....wishing there was a chat room on FS, so that we could actually "talk".
hope u fall asleep soon, and sorry about the chocolate.
 
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bubbs96
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10/29/08 2:18 PM
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I know bingeing and weight gain is soooooo hard to deal with (I just had to gain over 20 lbs in treatment, and now a new med for my bp/heart rate is making me gain more!!)....but is there ANY way you can be proud of the fact that you didn't purge? it's one less symptom you used....I know in the moment, the guilt can take over everything, but looking back, how much worse off would things be if you purged....at least that's one thing you managed to control......*shrugs* just trying to look at it positively, i know its sooo hard......(((hugs)))
(also, the less you purge, the less water-weight fluctuations you'll have....)


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"Recovery is a process, not an event."
Even when it doesn't look like it, I am trying, and I'm doing my best in the moment.
 
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mouse
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10/30/08 2:38 AM
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Debbi, i'm not up in the middle of the nite...that is my wake up time sadly enough....I go to sleep early and then wake up at crazy times.....ideally i'd wake up at 3:30. But either way i get my 8 hrs of beauty rest since about 3 days ago. (Rozerem rules!!!!!)


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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mouse
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Posts: 1932
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10/31/08 3:14 AM
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bubbs, debbi, thanx so much for your support. i still feel like big fat pig, but not as much and i don't feel as much of a failure.


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All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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strugglingbutalive
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10/31/08 2:51 PM
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Hi, I'm new on this site, but I've been following the post for about a week now. I just wanted to say that I hope you're feeling a little better about yourself now Munkster. I can identify with that feeling very very well. I've been struggling with an ed for a long time and have been in hospitals more often than not for about seven years. I'm so sick and tired (in general and) of doing this, but at the same time, I know that if someone offered me a pill right now that would "cure" me, honestly, I don't think I would take it. People comment about the way I look and are worried about me, but even though I know better than anyone the lengths that I go to lose weight/avoid gaining, I never believe that I'll really die. I've been on feeding tubes/other types of nutrition for years and I can't believe that I have let myself get so behind on life.... Sorry for babbling, hope everyone has a good Shabbos!


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"It's okay to try and fail and try and fail again, but its not okay to try and fail and fail to try again."
 
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