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TOPIC TITLE: don't belong...
Created On 9/2/11 6:23 PM
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Ineedspace
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9/2/11 6:23 PM
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Ok, this is a bit complicated to explain. so I have my issues, I have my past baggage, and ok, I am in therapy. However, I don't carry a diagnosis, so where exactly do I fit. I have emotional issues, many of them, been through a lot in my life and still am. I want support, I NEED support, I NEED to network, yet still, couldn't find a thread that exactly speaks to me. Don't get me wrong, I logged in to many of them, and I learned from all of you. I still needed to vent and couldn't find the right outlet for me. I didn't get lost though, I made a decision to open my own thread. For those of you who feel doomed, stuck, trapped, and most importantly DON'T FIT, I'd like to hear your experience.
 
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channafofanna
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9/4/11 3:17 PM
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WAY TO GO!!!!!
btw- you are allowed to "hang" by the other threads, no one really has a perfectly textbook diagnossis, most people can identify with more than one thread...
you are so awsome for that, i hope you know it...
 
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Ineedspace
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9/5/11 4:23 PM
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Thanks Chana, you're right and I do hang out in the other threads. Sometimes I do wish that there's a support group for women like me who are simply either emotionally drained or who experienced past trauma, or those who feel doomed to failure, etc. Bottom line, for women who struggle to make it, without an attached "label" according to the DSM. But I do find this forum fascinating. It's amazing to have an outlet to vent, share, read, learn, grow, inspire and get inspired. We can give and receive at the same time; we can sit on either chair, the helper vs helpee.
 
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LuYitzlach
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9/5/11 4:37 PM
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Well, I’m not exactly a woman yet, so I don’t know if I “qualify” for this thread… but I am female, and I DEFFINITELY DO NOT belong anywhere… I don’t either have any DSM label (tho that might be because I haven’t been to a therapist…)
If you want to know my experiences… well… most of my life has been spent going from trauma to trauma, picking up some baggage along the way. Yes, people say that my experiences have made me better and more mature than my years, but that doesn’t really feel so good… That’s probably why I feel like I don’t fit in – I so don’t feel like I’m living on the same planet as the other kids my age… they seem like lightyears away from me... and I definitely feel, as you say, “doomed, stuck, trapped, etc.” Just thinking about my life ahead of me seems so insurmountable… if only there was a way to go under “anesthesia” for it all
If you want advice, I don’t think I can give much, since I’m still feeling trapped… but I did find that learning about the Judaic reasons for suffering helped me a bit to not fly off my rockers…
 
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Ineedspace
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9/5/11 8:27 PM
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Luyitzlach, first of all, welcome, I already feel connected. You hit it right on target, I've been through trauma after trauma, and it was no fun. I don't know how you're surviving without a therapist. I hope you have other resources that help you get through. And yea, anesthesia sounds like an idea, but you know what, it would eventually wear off...what you're saying about judaic reasons for suffering, you're right, could be helpful. Although sometimes we cannot fully understand the reasons, we at least know that we don't know and we try to trust. Its hard, tough, and challenging, especially when trauma perpetuates throughout life. I sometimes do feel like giving up, ENOUGH! Yet, somehow I manage to find strength I never knew I had. But for me the hardest part is to feel ALONE. Lonely and alone, secluded, don't belong. I'm glad, I can now start to feel connected...
 
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LuYitzlach
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9/6/11 4:07 PM
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(About a therapist, well… I hafta learn to survive... since I don’t have money I have to learn to deal on my own…)
In any case, Yea, feeling alone is pretty hard! And feeling like you don’t belong makes it feel even harder cuz there’s nowhere to even look for company. Like, if I felt like I belonged to a community or group, @least there would be hope that I can one day find someone within the group to make me not be alone. But if we don’t even feel like we belong anywhere, there’s nowhere to even look…
But I guess I’m lucky that I’m sort of an introvert to begin with. Socializing is more of a burden for me than a pleasure, so most of the time I don’t mind being alone with myself. It’s only once in a while that I want someone to talk to that I feel the loneliness…
 
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