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TOPIC TITLE: Refuse to take Anti Depressants
Created On 5/17/06 10:42 AM
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PAOPS
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5/17/06 10:42 AM
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I refuse to take medications of any kind because they just cover up the problem and another issue is I cannot take anything that would interfere with driving abilities because It would be difficult for me to get to work without driving.

I am a single, 39 Observant Jewish woman who finds it very difficult to get close to people. I also have a hard time accepting being a woman altogether because being behind a "curtain" so to speak always leaves me with the constant feeling of rejection.

To the best of my ability I've been to psychiatrists and/or psychologists without much help and I've even had experiences with the last one taking telephone calls during my sessions (more than once).

Thank G-d I am in good physical health and have a decent job, but not much else outside of that. G-d knows I try to go to services, seeking Hashem's help but I am limited in that capacity. I have written a confidential letter to the rabbi of my synogogue to express why I feel so much emotional pain with no response (although I don't blame him for this because perhaps this is not his area of expertise).

I probably am in need of therapy but find myself in a "dead end" feeling of dispare.

Any suggestions -- NO MEDICATIONS PLEASE.

Thank you

Bklyn718@aol.com


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Ronna M. Boujo
 
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ernie55B
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5/17/06 12:02 PM
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Hello,

Just need to say that anti-depressants don't cover up the problem. They help me get through the day, so that I can deal with the problems in therapy.

Also, not all of them make you drowsy. Some do the opposite.
Those that do make you drowsy can be taken at night only.

A psychiatrist who takes calls during a session is unprofessional and you should find someone else.

A Rabbi who doesn't answer your letters is unprofessional and rude.
Maybe find another Rabbi.

Best of luck,
Ernie
 
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gad
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5/17/06 5:06 PM
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Re antidepressants,
I agree with Ernie. He defined and explained the issue nicely.

Re curtain: It may help to look at it as an opportunity to find intimacy with G-d, in a curtained private place.

Re finding it difficult to get close to people: I wonder if your synagogue has a sisterhood; and if so, if you could get involved in some of their projects.

It' good to see that you have health and livelihood, and may G-d Almighty also help you find meaning and true joy and happiness.
 
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RNRebbitzin
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5/22/06 11:25 PM
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hi PAOPS,
If you are in such dispear, why do you refuse to take medication? Why go through life feeling miserable when there is a simple solution to part of your problem. If you had hypertension or diabetes you would take medication for those ailments wouldn't you? Well, depression is a medical illness.....it only means you have a lack of neurotransmitters in your brain. There is no shame in taking medication. No one but you and your doctor need know.
If you are afraid of being tired most have the opposite affect and make you more alert and focused. The type that make people sleepy are taken at bedtime. Once your body gets used to the medication most of those side effects disapear.
Get unstuck,,,,,,,,,,,,,,you need an extra boost... Give it a try, you have nothing to lose except your depression.
Hope your find your answer and begin to feel good.
Zei Gezunt


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RNRebbitzin
 
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PAOPS
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5/23/06 8:23 AM
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In the past I have tried anti-depressants (i.e. Zolft) with absolutely no relief whatsoever. Again, (of course hopefully somebody will truely understand what I am typing here) I CANNOT take medications that would interefere with driving.
There is not one doctor who can guarantee that any anti-depressants won't interfere with that issue.

I do need guidance however, in trying to work through my problems but I absolutely HATE therapists because more than one therapist that I've been to would take telephone calls during my sessions. That together of this constant feeling of "rejection" just adds to the emotional hurt.

In my occupation, I've been asked to train other people in the areas of expertise that I know within my company. When I provided training in those areas, I would take particular care in ensuring those individuals are comfortable in doing the job on their own without difficulty.

How come I cannot get the same courtesy in return from a therapist who would go step by step to see exactly what is bothering me and how to resolve it WITHOUT MEDICATION !! There is not one person who will convince me otherwise?

I do appreciate the advise.

Thanks.


-------------------------
Ronna M. Boujo
 
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Debbi
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5/23/06 11:20 AM
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Hi PAOPS,

Sorry to hear that you are feeling such despair.

There are a few points I would like to make.
There are many different kinds of medications on the market. Often the warning labels on these meds will read "could cause drowsiness, do not operate machinery etc". Sometimes the pharmecutical companies are forced to put these warnings on their products because of law suits.
I am not saying that there is no legitimacy to the warnings, but most often one would need to try them and only then can one measure the side effects, and how much, if at all it would limit you.

do you drive at night?
If so you can take the meds in the morning.
I truly understand your hesitancy in taking medication. I doubt that any healthy person would feel comfortable being forced to rely on a drug in order to function. I imagine (no offense meant) that the driving problem is your way of resisting the fact that you really do not want to take meds in the first place.

Probably you would have to work through that resistance before you can make a wise decision.

I am curious, what do you mean about "being behind a curtain"? Would you mind saying more about those feelings?
I also think that you were probably correct in your assumption that your letter was out of your Rabbi's league. You sound intelligent and knowledgable, he probably didnt know where to begin.

As far as the therapists are concerned. There are many good, proffesional trustworthy therapists around. I can give you some names if you wish. PM me and let me know. There is NO excuse for taking phone calls during the 50 min you are paying for.
As you said, you give your trainees respect by devoting your time in "being" with them, and so should your therapist. I'm sorry you've had such bad experiences.
However it pays to keep in mind that sometimes there are emergencies when a therapist feels they must take a phone call. It should not be happening every session though.

Hope you begin feeling better soon.
Let us know how you are doing.

debi
 
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Dr. Lynn, Psy.D.
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5/24/06 5:57 AM
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PAOPS-
There are plenty of therapists who do not take calls during sessions. I do not, for example, and feel it is rude and unprofessional.
a lynn
 
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Debbi
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5/28/06 10:07 PM
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hi PAOPS,
I was wondering how u have been feeling the last few days.
let us know, if u feel up to it.

tc
debi
 
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RuchamaShayna
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1/8/09 2:10 PM
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I'm posting the name of a book you all should read. If any of you have been diagnosed or have a loved one diagnosed, it is a very important book to read because it explains that it is usually not so weird or so hopeless when someone is diagnosed, and that a lot of medication is not the way to go--it may be okay to use for a very short time, but it's really not good to use for long, and it is usually a bad idea to use medication as the only way to get better. It won't work. An excellent support system works much better than medication for most. I know this is true, becasue I've been through this. The author of this book has been curing so-called "hopeless cases" with attentiveness and kindness since he was in COLLEGE, and he is not the only one who can help people. His book doesn't only explain what works and what doesn't--it also has a list of doctors and places that can help in a kind and loving way. The reason these listed doctors and facilities have a much higher rate of success is because they treat the patients with compassion and respect, which people suffering from so-called mental disorders desperately need.

I copied this from his website for you. I read this book a while ago and found it very helpful, and I think it will help you, too.

Toxic Psychiatry:
Why therapy, empathy, and love must replace the drugs, electroshock, and biochemical theories of the “new psychiatry.”
by Peter Breggin, M.D.
Paperback published 1991 by St. Martin's Press

Toxic Psychiatry remains Dr. Breggin's most complete overview of psychiatry and psychiatric medication. It has influenced many professionals and lay persons to transform their views on the superior value of psychosocial approaches compared to medication and electroshock.
 
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oops
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5/25/09 6:34 PM
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I read a newer book, Medication Madness. And I still believe that if you're desperate enough to seek meds, you should be taking them. Depression is plenty harmful for the body.
 
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mouse
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5/26/09 4:05 AM
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You should consider interviewing your therapist before meeting with them. Explain and underline the fact that phone calls during a session, no matter the circumstances, will not be tolerated since that seems to bother you a lot. (It bothered me a lot too until I found a therapist that wouldn't (good thing) and a pychiatrist who would (good thing -- because he took ALL EMERGENCY calls in sessions-- which I found acceptable because not frequent at all.) You should set the ground rules before meeting with the therapist as the therapist usually sets ground rules with billing, etc. with you too.

As for medication. I get you are not pro-meds. I must admit I think you are not keeping all avenues open and perhaps have not done all the research you could have done; however, I understand your concerns as initially, I had similar concerns. Not all people respond the same way to medications. For example, for me, Zoloft caused my blood pressure to plummet (we suspect...either that or it went sky high...but pretty sure it plummeted.) And in fact, most other meds just didn't work or made me suicidal. Eventually, I was put on a very, very odd combination of medications including a stimulant (which wouldn't make a horse sleep in a million years.) So there are many options out there. Do your research and go about it as a consumer not as a patient and sometimes you have more success. But I know....


-------------------------

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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trekstein
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5/28/09 3:07 AM
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That sounds like a wise decision, if you don't feel that anti-depressants are right for you. You should know that it is not a case of 'anti-depressants or nothing': there is a wide range of alternative therapies which do not involve you ingesting chemicals and are unlikely to harm you.

Homoeopathy is one such approach. You might also consider Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) a 'distant cousin' of acupuncture which, also it is rather bizarre, has resulted in dramatic improvements for many people. Feel free to contact me if you require any further information.
 
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Yitzchak
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2/27/15 3:39 PM
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I can definitely relate, both to your circumstances and your reluctance to take medication. I too have trouble getting close to people, had a therapist who took phone calls in the middle of the session (just one symptom of many others indicating he wasn't really focusing his mind on my situation), rabbis who won't touch my case. The rabbi thing is even more frustrating because my issues are so closely tied to religion but rabbis should be involved with all their congregants' needs. I've only been seeking relationship-based help for my issues for 3-4 years, so what do I know about what works and what doesn't, but my plan is to go rabbi-hopping, possibly for the rest of my life, until someone will listen. I would go therapist-hopping, too, but I take a dim view of in-network therapists at present and can't afford out-of-network.

I find it is very hard to get close to ordinary people because they are not interested in speaking about deep emotional pain. Only those who have experienced it are interested in those topics. Of course one can have a closeness of sorts with people even without speaking of the pain, but we all need someone to talk to. Maybe you can start a local group for lonely people, where they get together now and then and do some activity.

About the pills, I do believe there are two types of depression. The type that has no real underlying cause I would be open to medication (after all other options have been exhausted). There is after all something irrational and it has a net negative effect on our lives, is a conclusion one might arrive at. I have more or less come to that conclusion about my anxiety by now, although there are some objections I have which need to be worked through before I am completely comfortable with rejecting this element of my personality which Hashem has given me.

The second type of depression is caused by one's life circumstances, in this case medication really is just covering up the problem. ernie has a valid point that medication can sometimes be helpful even in such cases but that is each person's responsibility to decide about that and besides it doesn't fully apply to you, since you aren't in therapy. I am getting scared now because I'm beginning to see the case for medication. I feel like I'm losing my mind, I was so anti-medication until today and I believed it was escaping the problem which Hashem wanted us to deal with, suddenly I find myself thinking maybe I should just take a pill and focus on other things, am i losing my mind? or was i just not thinking clearly until today?
 
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