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TOPIC TITLE: Love Hate Relationship
Created On 3/24/13 4:48 PM
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Lasthope
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3/24/13 4:48 PM
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Sometimes i love Gd because this world he created is amazing but sometimes i hate him because of all the suffering i go through. I get so angry and frustrated at all the obstacles he puts in front of me and literally feel burning hatred for him. Is there a middle ground? How can i stop being angry at Gd?
 
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Dr. Price MD
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3/24/13 5:12 PM
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Great question. I suppose this is where faith comes in to play. It takes great strength to keep faith during hard times. It sounds stupidly simple and naive but everything works out in the end, whether in this lifetime or the next. The hard times also allow us to appreciate the better times. The obstacles are also supposed to help us grow in some way and in that respect even those are for the ultimate good somehow, someway. And then there are trials we can simply not understand at all for which we have to resign ourselves to not understanding the ways of G-D and for which we must simply pray for mercy and understanding. I hope this has been somewhat helpful to you.

Rabbi Price, M.D.
www.RabbiMD.com
 
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star
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3/24/13 5:44 PM
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Isnt being angry still considered having a relationship with Hashem? Cuz boy am i angry at Him right now.


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there is light at the end of the tunnel
 
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Dr. Price MD
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3/24/13 5:49 PM
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Correct.
 
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star
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3/24/13 6:25 PM
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thanks.


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there is light at the end of the tunnel
 
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Mimi1022
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3/24/13 9:29 PM
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I hope it's ok but I wanted to add on to what Dr Price said.
I suffer a lot and would not choose to have an illness obviously. But I have benefitted in some ways, including:

1. Having this illness has given me the opportunity to meet people I otherwise never would have met. I have great respect for my doctors and I feel privileged to be working with them.
2. I've had friends tell me they are on antidepressants and they feel ashamed. When I tell them about my own struggles, they feel relieved they are not the only one with depression. So my depression experience helps other people feel more normal
3. I have more compassion for people. When I saw an emotionally disturbed person being taken away by hatzalah at a restaurant I felt bad for him that he had a mental illness whereas everyone else got scared of him

Things I struggle with are: feeling jealous of people doing things I know I will never be able to do
 
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Lasthope
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3/28/13 3:59 PM
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Mimi: i agree with you about the compasdion. This illness jas made me extremely compasdionate for other people in pain and like you said, when you saw that mentally unstable person, tou felt compassion while others felt fear. I feel the same way..

Dr Price, it does help in some miniscule way by you saying that everything will turn out ok in the end. I know its the truth but it still doesnt make the pain go away but its something. My problem is with this whole anger business is that i feel like Gd doesnt care about me and just lets me feel aweful and in a lot of emotional pain (and physical sometimes) so why should i care about him? So recently ive been losing my desire to keep mitzvos like ive been skipping brachos a lot and not bentching here and there. I purposely disnt even start counting the omer this year because im just so mad. I really feel like he hates me, so why should i do any of these things for him? Im starting to lose my desire to be religious because of this... And its affecting my husband who sees me in so much pain and says heck how could a "loving" Gd hurt my wife and my family so much. Who needs this?
 
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star
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3/28/13 5:36 PM
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this yom tov I told gd: you break me, I'll break your laws. (and that's what I did, although it might have been a mitzva to save my life,not sure.)


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