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TOPIC TITLE: new here, please help!
Created On 6/25/08 2:53 PM
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Mirafox
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6/25/08 2:53 PM
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I'm new to these forums but unfortunately not new to suffering from mental issues.
Please, i'm from the confused.............unexplainable.............sufferers. I'm on Effexor for the past 5 years, although my problem began as a kid (almost 20 yrs ago).
the doctor that put me on medicine has never ever recommended therapy, he said i'll be able to live with those thoughts/feelings and not be bothered. That was true for the first 2 years on med, then "it" started to hit back here and there, but now i'm back to A!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like "i don't want to be", not die, but "never have been" because some of my thoughts (actually my original[?] problem), are that it's only my mind living. I just can't take it anymore!!! because by now i have a family and i feel like i can't handle life due to those feelings/thoughts/unxplainable tenseness/jumbled worries, and above all, living when nobody is!
So now i switched doctor who increased my effexor from 225 to 300mg and put me on Lamictal, AND recommends therapy.
I met with the recommended therapist and am now even more.......................no words to express. I feer that she'll be doing what she calls cbt or dbt and she'll talk what's not applicable to me! because my issue is above and beyond what anybody can understand, because my thoughts are fact, it's only my mind thrown here into all this living world, and i just want to stop my mind from operating, not sleep nor die! i'm fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up of being fed up OF THE FEELINGS AND UNFEELINGS THOSE THOUGHTS BRING ME INTO.


So please everybody help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! somebody that understands this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! should i put my money now into something my dear husband says i should, but i know behind me that there's no help for this because fact is fact.

 
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Mirafox
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6/25/08 3:03 PM
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i read my post, and don't see that i should have expressed myself! I don't find myself in those words, meaning if somebody else whould've written it, i wouldn't say "oh i have the same"
do you get it? it's just unexplainalbe sh'b'unexplainable!!!! do you get it?
i see the attendance here is not at all big, i'm the only one logged in now!
please everybody reply something as soon as you read, i need to get some insight before I..........overdrug myself or the kind (oh no, then i'll be in even deaper trouble!!!)
 
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mouse
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6/25/08 4:52 PM
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Seems to me giving it a try won't hurt much. (Money can be replaced, years of unhappy living can't.) Your husband is thinking more clearly than you possibly right now. He isn't in the middle of the situation. You sound to me like you are running around in circles in a panic trying to figure out what to do...chasing your tail. It won't get you anywhere. Stop. Listen to husband. He sounds supportive. (Sure hope so.) Maybe I'm reading ths wrong but it sounds to me like you convinced yourself that things can't get better because it is reality. Sometimes although reality is reality, it can be skewed by our inner thoughts. It's like a politician and the ppl. who are paid to "spin" a negative story so it's positvie.
gluck


-------------------------

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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kensingtonmom
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6/25/08 7:38 PM
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The very best thing you can do for yourself is find a good therapist. I can't tell from your post what your issue is but you can go to the website of nefesh and find a therapist based on how you search. Just click on FIND A THERAPIST and follow the prompts. You can also call RELIEF for a referral. Don't wait another day to find someone to help you. Good luck.
 
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Mirafox
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6/27/08 3:17 AM
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ok, i got it clear what keeps me from starting therapy.
the therapists all talk about cbt dbt which i agree is good for general issues as somebody has explained it here out it works.
BUT MY CASE IS DIFFERENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's thoughts that can't change because it's true, and these thoughts bring feelings of not wanting to be! and that's what i want!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm afraid to start therapy and actually face what i know is going to happen. i'll feel frustrated that this doens't touch my problem!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
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mouse
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6/27/08 5:13 AM
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CBT is different from DBT.


-------------------------

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again.
 
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bubbs96
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6/27/08 7:58 AM
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not all therapists use cbt....different theoretical approaches can be more or less helpful to the same person at different points in their lives....i, for example, switched about 2 years ago to a psychoanalytic/psychodynamic therapist after YEARS of absolutely refusing to even try even hints of this approach, and its been working for me now....as munkster mentioned above, there's also dbt, which is different from cbt.....there are MANY different approaches, not all cbt....just keep an open mind, and don't focus so much on the titles....find a therapist who "clicks" with you....


-------------------------
"Recovery is a process, not an event."
Even when it doesn't look like it, I am trying, and I'm doing my best in the moment.
 
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su7kids
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6/27/08 9:06 AM
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Mirafox, maybe a therapist can help you deal with the truths that you know. Maybe they can help you adapt your "differences" and cope with them? I think its worth a try!!


-------------------------
Proud Mom of 7, MIL to 3, Grandmom of 4!
 
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gad
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7/1/08 2:51 AM
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Quote

Originally posted by: Mirafox
but i know behind me that there's no help for this

Many people have felt like you, that there seemed to be no help for them. Yet many continued to hope. And many times a cure was found.
I hope that you will soon have good news to post.


 
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HopefulMommy
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7/8/08 12:28 AM
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I am not sure I understand what you mean. Are you saying that your thoughts and issues go much deeper than everyday problems that cbt addresses? If that's what you mean then it makes perfect sense. Then you need to find somebody you can discuss these issues with. Are they religious issues? Maybe talking to a wise rabbi would be helpful.

But what do you mean that they are true? How do you know they are true?

My therapist told me that medication rarely solves the problem. Usually people do need some kind of therapy, or at least someone to talk to.

Good luck!
 
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Mirafox
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7/9/08 3:43 PM
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pfffffffffff,
with me the problem is more like i don't want to be helped, oh, don't you all jump down my throat for saying this. but this is what i'm sort of obligated to feel because it's the truth, and it's too complicated to live with those thoughts and feelings so i'd rather not!!!!
i've actually started therapy which seems to go nowhere
 
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HopefulMommy
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7/14/08 1:46 AM
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Maybe what you need is not a therapist, but a sensitive rabbi who would be able to help you with your thoughts and questions. Therapists are not qualified to address religious issues.

I will just tell you two things that I learned from two different rabbis.

First, everything is an illusion. You are absolutely correct. But that's the beauty of it. This whole world was set up in order to give us an opportunity to connect to Hashem in a meaningful way. It's all a game, so to speak, because only Hashem is real. But He wanted to make this opportunity real for us. I don't know if this is making sense. If not, I can try explaining it more.

Second, any thought that makes you depressed is not coming from kedushah. A true thought brings you simcha. If a thought disempowers you, you can safely assume that it is not true and dismiss it.

Hope this helps.
 
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rainbow
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7/14/08 10:16 AM
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Mirafox, I find your posts disturbing. Why would a person be 'obligated' to feel anything? You started therapy, and feel it does not work? give it some more time. Come back to this forum as much as you want. We are all here to listen, and help you feel better.
You are totally anonymous. No one knows who you are.....So you can really dump all your pent up emotions her. We listen, but are not judgemental.
Many of us have been at a point that we thought was beyond return, many of us have begun seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

If you would rather prefer to vent via private messages, I am sure that munkster, kensingtonmom, bubbs96, su7kids, gad, hopefulmommy, or rainbow would be happy to listen to you.

Talking about it helps!!! Never keep it all bottled up inside of you.

There is a bright light at the tunnel. You can't see it yet, but with hashems help, you will soon.

You have a family that loves you. If not for yourself, do it for those around you that love and daven for you.

Sadly, very many of the people on this forum have been where you are.....So we all understand.

Hatzlocha!!!! We are waiting for your reply.

 
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Dr. Lynn, Psy.D.
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7/14/08 11:48 PM
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Mira-
You should know that it is completely normal to want to get better and to also NOT want to get better. Just like yetzer hara and yetzer tov. When you can accept that you have feelings of wanting to keep that status quo, or wanting to be self-destructive, etc., then you can start to address the issues. Very often, people have very strong self judgements that actually prevent them from adressing their problems. While you are beating yourself up, you can't start the healing.
a lynn
 
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