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TOPIC TITLE: Miscarriage
Created On 1/7/05 11:28 AM
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saramalka
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1/7/05 11:28 AM
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It seems as though EVERYONE around me is pregnant. I was too, for a short time, but was too afraid to tell anyone. I kept it close to the heart, which was a good idea because I lost another pregnancy (my 8th). I wish B'shaah Tova to everyone and try my best to be a "surrogant" aunt. I know that every miss is a neshama but it is still hard.
 
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lookinforhelp
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1/9/05 6:44 PM
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I'm so sorry for you. I'm not even married (and obviously have no kids), so I cannot begin to imagine the pain you are going through. One quick remark however: my aunt had one child and then many miscarriages. One miscarriage was even a set of twins, a boy and a girl. It was horrible, as she was very young and all her friends were up to 3 or 4 kids and she had just one. Then someone recommended a different doctor, one who specializes in high risk pregnancies, and she went to him- and now she has three more beautiful, healthy children KN"H! Maybe you could switch doctors too?
 
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saramalka
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1/10/05 11:29 AM
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Thank you for your kind words. I actually did have 2 kids inbetween all the misses, and since. I went for some controversial procedures previously...but they are no longer available. It just seems so hard say, "i'm finished having babies" or "I can't have babies" when the choice is not yours, but HKB"H.
 
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happy2bme
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3/12/06 9:02 PM
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Hi there, I'm new here and wanted to just say that I had a miscarriage 2 months ago. I was 13 weeks and and found an empty sac on the ultrasound and I had a D & E the next day. B"H I have a 2 yr old son who I'm very very thankful for and a wonderful supportive husband too.

Just a thought about what you said that every miss is a neshama...is this true in such a case where there is an empty sac? I tend to think there isn't, but I haven't asked a Rav this. What does anyone think about this? Interested to hear your feedback.

Thank you.
 
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chanieF
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3/13/06 3:19 AM
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if you have not yet checked out the ATIME site, specifically the forum there for pregnancy loss, i'd highly recommend it. and order yourself a pregnancy loss packet from them as well.
your emotions are totally normal; give yourself time to grieve.

i don't know what evaluations you had or which drs you saw, but note that there have been many new diagnoses and treatments out in recent years (and some new drs who are very good!)...perhaps, when/if you are ready, consider an eval with a MFM specialist (a new speciality that didn't exist some yrs ago) or an RE that is very thorough in not overlooking things, in addition to a good hematologist, as there are quite a number of new thrombophilias they can now tests for. if you post atime, people can probably try to recommend excellent specialists near you in each of these areas.

(((hugs)))
 
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happy2bme
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3/13/06 12:54 PM
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Yes, I agree with ChanieF about ATIME website and their pregnancy loss packet. A friend told me about it and I ordered one right away and it's really good, you must get one. I haven't looked at everything in there yet, but I especially like the booklet of personal stories and the music cd. The website forums are also very good to look at and see that other ppl are going through similar difficulties and a lot are going through MORE than we are ourselves-- so it really gives you chizuk to see you're not alone AND that you don't have it the worst-- there is always someone who has it harder than you-- so it makes us realize what brachos we have from Hashem and be thankful for what we have--so I also highly recommend looking at that.

ChanieF- I've seen your name on ATIME's forums and you definitely sound like you know a lot-- so I ask you what you think about my neshama question. Also, what is your email? I'd like to ask you some questions individually. Thanx.

 
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chanieF
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3/19/06 6:02 PM
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you can email me any time at chanief@gmail.com
though i know alot about endo (the most common cause of unexplained IF and associated conditions such as repeated IVF failures) and am fairly well-versed in pcos and a number of other conditions, i am certainly not a rav, but there is ALOT of info on this subject of neshamas at the atime pregnancy loss forum. someone recently posted this article which addresses the issue: http://www.chabad.org/theJewishWoman/article.asp?AID=337722
i hope you find it helpful.
 
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chanieF
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5/30/06 1:35 PM
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the pregnancy loss packet actually has a beautiful article which addresses this topic. it's a letter called "a mission fulfilled," written by Rav Moshe Wolfson to a woman who had a mc. VERY worth reading.
 
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bracha
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1/17/07 2:01 PM
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Hi, I am marry for 4 years and finally got pregnant 3 months ago I was the happiest person in the planet. Anfortionly last weak the doctor discovers that my baby was no longer a life and they hat to do a DC to removed the baby. I am berry sad and hopping that Hashem will recompense my pain by gabbing Baby’s to all Am Israel. AMEN.
 
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su7kids
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1/17/07 3:01 PM
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Bracha, hugs to you.


-------------------------
Proud Mom of 7, MIL to 3, Grandmom of 4!
 
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Donald Duck
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3/12/07 9:21 PM
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The article that chanief gave a link to is great it helped me so much after my miscarrige. The A T.I.M.E website helped as well.

I'm so sorry for your loss i hope you dont suffer any more


-------------------------
D Duck
 
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