Login
Questions or Comments!
admin@frumsupport.com

Get FrumSupport News! Join our mailing list.
Email:


Search

Navigation:

 Tehilim List  < Refresh >
TOPIC TITLE: who am i really?
Created On 7/8/13 5:26 PM
Topic View:

View thread in raw text format


I'mTrying
Senior Supporter

Posts: 407
Joined: Dec 2008

7/8/13 5:26 PM
User is offline

I watch a baby a few times a week, starting when he was 2 weeks old. Now he's 9 1/2 months.
The past few months I've been struggling with thoughts of wanting to hurt him. I thought it was just me going stir crazy from being inside too much (this was when it was still cold outside). I see now it's not that. Thankfully I have not done anything to him, except maybe being a little rough. I hope no one will judge me for this. I always thought I was the kind of person who wouldn't hurt anyone else. I'd rather hurt myself first. I don't know why I want to hurt this innocent adorable baby. My only answer is depression. But I feel like that's just an excuse.
Dr. Lynn, Do you think this is the real me coming out? what do I do with this? How can a person want to hurt (like throw him across the room) a baby?
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     



channafofanna
Senior Supporter

Posts: 1351
Joined: Jul 2009

7/8/13 6:59 PM
User is offline View users profile

Im not Dr. Lynn, but heres my 2 cents- I dont know how old you are, but why would it be that the "Real you" would wait until your X years old to start showing? And I think that I once heard that dreaming of wanting to hurt people is a symptom prevelant in many abuse vcitims (so if its a symptom, it cant be the disease, right? so to if its a symptom, it cant be you)
but hats off to you for realizing you have a problem and taking steps to help yourself- youve solved half the problem already!!!
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     



channafofanna
Senior Supporter

Posts: 1351
Joined: Jul 2009

7/8/13 7:00 PM
User is offline View users profile

plus, this is going to sound cheesey, but i mean it in all honesty- you cant fake the caring and sensitivity that you have, so that must be the real you and this issue is just blocking it a bit....
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     



wishtobehappy
Senior Supporter

Posts: 836
Joined: Aug 2011

7/8/13 7:16 PM
User is offline

wish, I can totally relate and from what I've read, it happens to many people. I used to feel like doing it to my own kids. For me, it was the result of an enormous amount of repressed anger, which I've slowly gotten rid of over the years. I think it's important to discuss with a therapist or pdoc, so you don't ever act on the impulse.
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     



HopefulMommy
Senior Supporter

Posts: 1612
Joined: Nov 2005

7/9/13 12:33 AM
User is offline

I can relate too, unfortunately. I've felt this way with my first baby. I don't remember how I got passed it, but somehow I did.
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     



toy123
Senior Supporter

Posts: 834
Joined: Sep 2009

7/9/13 3:27 AM
User is offline



-------------------------
Sometimes you need to run away just to see who will follow you.

Sometimes when I say "I'm okay", I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight and say "I know you are not".

Just because I'm smiling doesn't mean I'm happy.

Edited: 7/10/13 at 12:15 PM by toy123
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     



Dr. Lynn, Psy.D.
Psychologist

Posts: 914
Joined: Feb 2005

7/10/13 5:12 PM
User is offline

I don't feel I know you well enough to offer an explanation WHY you feel this way, but I do think it's important to address these aggressive thoughts. Does the baby "remind" you of anyone?
a lynn
 
Reply
   
Quote
   
Top
   
Bottom
     

View thread in raw text format
FORUMS > Ask Dr. Lynn > Ask Dr. Lynn < Refresh >

Navigation:

The information in this site is not intended to replace the advice of a doctor. FrumSupport disclaims any liability for the decisions you, the User, makes based on information on this site. By using this site, reading, viewing, posting or otherwise, you signify your assent to the Terms and Conditions of Use. If you do not agree to all these Terms and Conditions of Use, please do not use this site. FrumSupport may revise and update these Terms and Conditions of Use at anytime. Your continued usage of FrumSupport will mean you accept those changes.

If you think you or someone you know has a medical emergency, call your doctor, Hatzolah or 911 immediately. FrumSupport cannot and does not monitor forums and postings and cannot and will not pro-actively obtain help for users in need as FrumSupport does not have the funds or people power to accomplish such tasks and it will infringe on the anonymity of each user. Therefore, FrumSupport’s liability is limited by this paragraph and as further set forth in the Terms and Conditions of Use.