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TOPIC TITLE: Sadness
Created On 8/22/13 5:05 PM
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I'mTrying
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8/22/13 5:05 PM
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I've been working a bit with my therapist on connecting with the little girl inside me who didn't get what she needed... Yesterday I was feeling lonely and I realized I wanted to talk to my mother... and when I called, she talked to me about everyone else and didn't ask about me... I felt really sad. I feel sad. I feel for that little girl whose mother didn't want to hear her - her fears, her worries, her loneliness, her social problems, her school problems, her anxiety and pain and even her triumphs and successes and happiness.
It hurts.
 
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MoMo
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8/25/13 3:20 PM
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Just saw this.
Oy that's so sad. I'm so sorry
 
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channafofanna
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8/25/13 5:20 PM
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I feel sad for the little girl as well...
Hang in there, k?
((((HUGS))))))
 
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keep climbing
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9/1/13 6:06 AM
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I went to see my mother yesterday. I am pretty much estranged from her lately. I went as a good deed before Rosh Hashana.
The pain that arises is so hard to handle. The little girl inside me is crying so bitterly.
Nonody ever saw me or needed me.
And I swallowed everything all my life.
 
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MoMo
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9/1/13 9:54 AM
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Oy!!!!
I relate all too well!!!
I am always told not to bury the feelings but to try to give myself what I wasn't given.

Just from your posts on FrumSupport it is evident to me that you are a kind caring and wise person. You are precious!!!
 
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I'mTrying
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9/1/13 12:03 PM
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(((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))
I am with you.
 
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HopefulMommy
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9/3/13 1:06 AM
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(((Hugs))), Keep Climbing! That's really hard!
 
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Dr. Lynn, Psy.D.
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9/9/13 3:13 PM
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Thank you so much for sharing. Holidays bring up so much "stuff"...childhood memories, parental expectations, feelings towards Hashem. Keep posting and sharing.

Trying- YOU ARE ENOUGH!

A lynn
 
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Lasthope
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9/15/13 4:01 PM
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I can very much relate to that little girl story - im so sorry we didnt get what we so badly needed as kids and are suffering feim it till today. May Hashem heal your broken heart as well as everyone else in pain Umacha Hashem dima meal kol panim...one day it will happen...
 
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I'mTrying
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9/15/13 10:13 PM
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Dr. Lynn-
Thanks for your support.
What do you mean by "you are enough"?


Edited: 9/15/13 at 10:14 PM by I'mTrying
 
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Dr. Lynn, Psy.D.
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10/3/13 3:35 PM
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Trying,
When I read your post, I envisioned a girl innocently looking for love, attention and validation. When the parent is unable/unwilling to give, usually the child blames him/herself, and they feel unworthy of love. The internal monologue goes something like: "If my own mother doesn't love me..."

Perhaps I was taking too much liberty, but what I meant is to reassure you. Much of therapy is about having "corrective emotional experiences". Was I in the ballpark or off base?
a lynn
 
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I'mTrying
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10/3/13 10:20 PM
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Dr. Lynn,
I'm still not sure what you mean. I think the semantics are throwing me off.
I agree with you about the source of the pain and the self-blame.
I am working on recognizing that the pain exists, letting myself feel the hurt and then giving myself the validation that I needed/ need.
Is that what you meant? That my own validation is enough?
 
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