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TOPIC TITLE: so lonely and having difficulty functioning
Created On 6/9/14 10:16 AM
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getMeOutOfHere
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6/9/14 10:16 AM
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I look fine on the outside but I'm feeling so lonely and can't concentrate at work. Even when I hang out with people I still feel lonely, either then or right after. I can't concentrate at work which is really hard. Life seems like a waste of time. Everything is just a distraction. Nothing is real or meaningful. What should I do?
 
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Cutiestarr
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6/9/14 10:37 AM
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I'm sorry I feel like that too sometimes. What do you do for work? (maybe your coworkers are also bored.)
 
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channafofanna
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6/10/14 12:31 PM
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I can't offer any advice cuz I'm in that same place right now, but you should know you're not alone in ur loneliness... If thar makes any sense.
Question: what is ' meaningful' to you? What does it mean?
 
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getMeOutOfHere
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6/10/14 7:34 PM
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Some of my coworkers are also bored, but I don't think it impacts that as deeply. Also, I'm struggling to define meaning. I think family might be the only meaning that I have in my life. Religion used to have meaning, but lately I've given up on that.
 
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gad
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6/10/14 11:23 PM
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Are you seeing a therapist?
 
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channafofanna
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6/11/14 2:33 PM
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Those are things that have/had meaning to you, but how do you DEFINE meaning? and then maybe you could figure out some new ways to bring meaning into your life...
 
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getMeOutOfHere
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6/12/14 4:24 PM
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I am seeing a therapist and have been seeing one for many many years. I don't know how I would define a meaningful life. A lot of it has to do with having my own happy family, having a good relationship, etc and that's not possible when I struggle with religion cuz I have no clue who to date.
 
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gad
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6/12/14 11:54 PM
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Quote

Originally posted by: getMeOutOfHere
Religion used to have meaning, but lately I've given up on that.

Why?
 
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getMeOutOfHere
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6/17/14 6:35 PM
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Keeping shabbos and yom tov gives me anxiety, but not keeping it also gives me anxiety. I used to be interested in religion, in debate, exploration, learning, etc. but now it just seems like a nuisance. I also don't know where I stand religiously, what kind of household I want to have. I'm a lot less religious obviously than I grew up, but I always thought I would go back to being more religious when I had a family. Now I'm not so sure.
 
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gad
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6/17/14 10:58 PM
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There are certain aspects of religion, like bitochon - trust in G-d, which help us cope better with life.
Another helpful thing is when we try to help other people; we feel less lonely, and we feel that our lives have meaning.

When things are down, it can be difficult to focus on religion and other things. But maybe focussing, for now, on just the two above actions, may help to make you happier.

Hope to hear good news
 
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I'mTrying
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6/19/14 8:54 PM
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i identify a lot with your loneliness, lack of meaning and lack of desire for religion (anymore)...
 
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getMeOutOfHere
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6/24/14 8:13 PM
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Gad I'm really not open to hearing about how religion can help right now. Sorry.

Any other ideas people. I struggle not to cry at work and I feel so alone. I'm ready for life to end.
 
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gad
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6/24/14 9:03 PM
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Is there anything you enjoy doing? Like listening to music, or anything else?
 
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keep climbing
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6/25/14 5:36 AM
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For me, loneliness is directly tied to mood. If I feel better, I am less lonely. So I keep trying to beat these negative moods which are always lurking in the background.
It's very physical in my case-meds, exercise,shifting from one activity to the next, lots of treats and pleasure.
Hope this helps and you start feeling better.
 
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