Hi everyone,

I have a wonderful, thoughtful student (middle school age) with severe emotional dysregulation. She is emotionally volatile and displays common BPD traits such as black/white thinking, rapid/unpredictable/extreme mood shifts, idealization/devaluation of people and charged/stormy relationships, lack of trust in self and others, a lot of self-hatred and shame, lack of confidence...without the maturity and insight to recognize that her behaviors and symptoms are causing severe challenges (for various reasons, she absolutely refuses to consider going to therapy).

It's so sad - she has so many beautiful inner qualities and so many talents - she is kind, considerate of others, sensitive, articulate, artistic, caring, gentle, self-motivated, hardworking...I care about her a lot and want to help her.

Anyone here with BPD or who has family members with BPD - if you have suggestions of what I can do as her teacher to help her feel better about herself and gain confidence, I would really appreciate it. Thanks in advance!

I sent you a PM. Did you get it?

I know i"m replying mighty late, but i just saw this now and figure I'd answer. I hope the situation you described has calmed down. What has helped me and what is helping me is being validated for my feelings - intense or not, "normal" or not... Your student probably knows on some level that her behavior/actions are not proportioned. Validating doesn't mean agreeing. We can validate by showing empathy and sympathy and sharing one's pain. Once she sees that you truly understand her pain, she may feel safe and secure enough to open up. I hope this helps (if its still needed)!